Resilience

Its hard for me to hold something against someone that I so easily succumb to myself. There are those who would judge me, put me into a box they've formed in their mind. They have already mapped out my dimensions and objectified me, transforming a living being into a static entity. It all emanates from the pain we feel as a result of our ignorance combined with our assumption. When we decide to let the pain go, when we realize that nothing can harm us - only we can harm ourselves, then we can be truly liberated from the automatic process of casting judgement. When we stop living reactively and start living proactively, then we become a force in the world, rather than being subjected to the world's forces. Those who inspire great change did so not by grabbing hold of the world and forming it as they chose, but by taking as complete advantage as possible of the one thing in the world they could control, themselves. By gaining concious control of our own organism, and overriding the natural processes that are hardwired into us from nature and nurture, then we can truly become masters of our own destiny and our lives are directed not according to our urges, but according to our will. Then we begin to act in the interest of a world that exists in our vision for a better world, rather than reacting to the world of our past. The past can teach us many things, but it should only be utilized to the extent that it enriches us in the now and subsequently enlarges our future.I know that any time I suffer, any time I feel the pain of another, it is not something to be despised, or to flee from. I take hold of it as an opportunity for me to expand, for wherever there is pain there is room for growth. Thats all pain is to me, an indicator of potential improvement, and as such takes on a positive connotation. Whenever I am unsettled I know that I am expanding my boundaries and improving my ability to handle all the things that life brings my way. It is not for me to question the divine providence of the world, but to appreciate all things that enter my arena, for they can in no ways bring me down. If I am flexible in my approach and lenient in my understandings, then everything no matter how difficult holds the promise of enhancing my being, all I have to do is take advantage of it. As I grow in my understandings of the world and humanity, I feel especially privileged to be given this knowledge, and to take advantage of it wholly, but I also think what this knowledge is giving to the world at large. Sure it helps me to grow and advance, but what of all those out there who cringe from the nature of their reality? Most of us choose to despise what we have been given, hating our fortune, running away from opportunities simply because we choose to hold on to an old mindsets that increase our hurt. I don't know what makes me so willing to destroy my presuppositions, what it is that allows me to break myself down time and time again in the pursuit of higher spiritual awareness, but it is a gift that I hope not to take exclusive advantage of. There are many people out there who live in suffering and hold great pain entirely because they choose to. I want to show them a better way, a way to let go and not be afraid, a way to walk into that unsettling feeling and emerge a stronger person. We don't need to fear the fire if we know we will come out purer on the other side. Life is a fire, it tests us, builds us up. It applies the stresses that enhance our being. Through the continual application of pressure we become stronger, as a weight lifter puts on muscle, so our character grows by overcoming the challenges that life sets before us. In this way my capacity for love grows. Each heartache, each harsh word, each pain that is given to me from another person enhances my ability to absorb that pain, and respond in a positive manner. Once I allow the negativity of another to reflect in me, then I only contribute to the energy that brings them down, only now it is magnified within them and present within me also. Everyone loses. Someone has to forgive, someone has to be proactive - allowing their will to decide the state of their being, and not reactive - allowing their environment to decide the state of their being. By choosing to embody love, by seeing that those who cause hurt only cause it because they suffer, and understanding that I choose to give them the love that they may not deserve, but they desperately need - I can enhance my own understanding of love and capacity for it. There is a way that we are taught to react to pain, and then there is an entirely different way of loving through the pain, allowing that divine state to shine through you and out into the world. It is that way of being that I hope to achieve in greater amount, the ability to refuse all hurt, and be a source of benevolence, with no trace of malice. Of course there will be those who despise this way of being, or who mistrust it, refusing to believe in its possibility in the world because they refuse to believe in its possibility within themselves. We have martyrs for a reason. There are those whose goodness drives other people to heights of insanity, the result of a law of nature perhaps. For every action their is an equal and opposite reaction. For everyone that chooses to love, there is one who embodies suffering and so spreads it throughout the world because it is the nature of their being. By seeing my pain as beneficial, by continuing to strive for love within myself, I wash away layer after layer of accumulated suffering. I'll never get to be that perfect person, but it is not the result that I strive for, but rather the intention. It is the intention to be loving that forms within me a loving attitude, and where effort and attention are directed, change is bound to follow. Lifetimes are built one day at a time. It is by the consistent attention to the improvment of myself today that will result in the change I experience tommorow. I've spent so much of my life in tommorow and yesterday that I'd forgotten about today, and about the power that it gives us to live our life anew, to make changes, to be better people. Each and every day I change a little bit, my knowledge expands and I grow closer to that day when I will no longer reside on this earth and will move on to another existence. Then I will have my result and will be able to reflect on all I've done and say that I have come so far from where I thought I would go.